There are often times when I wish I was younger. Dont we all? Dont you sometimes wish that you didnt have that ache right there? or wish that you didnt have to go to work? or wish that you could be as carefree as you once were?
Sometimes I find myself wishing that I had more 'freedom'. I have a husband that I am SOOOO thankful for, but every now and then I wish I could not do his laundry. I have three BEAUTIFUL children that I would give my life for, but every now and then I wish I could run to lunch with a friend, or run out and grab a new shirt, or just RUN! Often times I dont have those 'luxuries' and I find myself wishing that my circumstances were just.. 'different'. Please dont get me wrong. I wouldnt want to live my life without my husband or children.
Today, as I sat in service, I found myself being so thankful that I am 33. As I surveyed the congregation I saw young mothers with more energy than myself, I saw grandmothers who were past the stage of having children at home, I saw women without children, women expecting babies, and I saw the carefree youth. And today, today I praised God for having me right where He has me. I know I have much maturing to do and I am FAR more willing to admit that today than I was 7 years ago. I know that I have much to learn. I know that I have room to grow. BUT today when I thought about how often I wish for youth and freedom, I thought about how ridiculous I sometimes am.
At 33, I am the wife to an amazing man who has a passion for putting the Word into the hearts of God's people. I knew that was his passion 6 years ago when I agreed to marry him, but today I have a deeper understanding of what that really means. And we have grown.. God has brought us so far. Yes, I still have much further to go.. but oh we have come so far.
At 33, I am the mother to THREE, YES THREE Babies! I have a three year old, a 2 year old and a 1 year old? Insane?? ABSOLUTELY! Would I have planned it this way?? ABSOLUTELY NOT! But God did. He knew just what I needed to be humbled. One baby? So sweet and SOO fun! Two babies? What a blessing and little girls I can dress and bow up! Three Babies? Sweet Jesus how I need you EVERY moment of EVERY day!! Praise God that in His humbling of my heart he provided me with dear friends and church members that are more than willing to befriend me and my sweet children.
At 33, many women are getting settled into their career. As am I!! My 'career' of teaching is behind me for the most part. Eight years and I was done! I lasted longer than most. BUT now for the real career. I am a mom! At 33, I am a mom that doesnt freak if my kids get sick because your kid was sick. I am a mom that can watch my toddler head straight for the corner of the table and not even flinch. I am a mom that can all of the sudden be missing one child and not completely come undone (especially when I am holding the child I was looking for:)! I am a mom that can educate my children and not compare them to other children. I am a mom that CAN serve up a healthy meal and a mom that can allow for pizza when necessary. Yes, I am settling into my career quite nicely, but I still have room to grow.
At 33 I feel just as passionately about things as I did when I was 22. That hasnt changed. It is the THINGS that have changed. I dont feel as passionate about THINGS as I do about people. Wait wait.. yes, I would still like the NEW Honda mini-van... at 22 it was a Honda Accord. Okay, so that aside, I find that I am much more passionate about the souls of people and the lives of the unborn than I am about Sign Language or selling jewelry. Priorities maybe?
At 33, God is doing a new work in me. He is bringing me to a place where I have never been. That is EXCITING! AND I have NO desire to go BACK!!!
